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She doesn't have time for me

I HAVE been going out with my partner for five months. She said she wanted to go slowly, which was fine because I really like her.

But, after five months it just seems like we are not progressing at all.

She won't even give me a proper kiss, we just kiss and cuddle in an innocent, childish kind of way and that's it.

When things start to get hotter she pushes me away and says it's time to go.

I am not a sex freak or anything but I really like her and want things to progress and share a deeper intimacy.

She's a 37 year old woman and at times it's like she's a 14 year old.

As though she's scared of having a proper adult relationship.

I am very patient and don't push her, but after five months I am starting to get frustrated.

Another problem is the priority she gives our relationship. She is always busy, and has little time for us.

She always has her time booked up weeks in advance.

Our time together has to be planned out in advance and I sometimes feel it's almost like I have to make an appointment to see her, even like I should be priviliged when she spares me five minutes.

I really like her, but I'm starting to get annoyed with all this. Am I wasting my time?

Agony Aunt says:

She sounds like a total nightmare to be honest with you.

Have you asked why she doesn't want to take things any further?

There may be a good reason for it. Try talking to her about how you feel. She may just not realise.

The other problem seems more serious. If she can't find time for you and your relationship then there is not much hope for it going any further.

It sounds to me like she is not too bothered about your relationship.

Talk to her about it and listen to what she says, but you may have to give her the elbow because you and her are just going nowhere.

3:22pm Monday 13th October 2003